My self esteem was rubbish. After the operation, after the bruising, after everything , I wore a tight T Shirt and could look down and see my feet without any objects in the way…. If you haven't experienced it , you cant imagine it. Total Bliss. For once in a long time , I felt "normal"...

 

At the end of 2005 I started on TRT (Testosterone Replacement Therapy). Oh My God!!!! If you haven't done it yet. PLEASE DO IT... I started with injections until I got sick and tired of the mood swings , I felt great for 3 weeks and then crashed , not good. I then took the plunge and went under the knife again , I now have 3 x 250mg Testosterone Implants in me.

 

They are absorbed into my blood stream and the procedure has to be repeated every 5 months. Its worth it. It’s a god send. Its heaven in a capsule….

 

I will try and explain the feeling.

 

Imagine if you could adjust the contrast and brightness on the way you see the world. This is a fraction of what happened. It's as if everything became brighter , I could see clearly, I could think clearer, I felt good about myself for the first time in a long time. Everything started to make sense. I started to make sense and the great thing is this. As other males get older their Testosterone levels will drop, mine won't  - this feeling will last a life time.

 

With my new found energy and clearer head, I started running. Everyday I would run 5 kilometres (3 miles) , regardless of the whether or how I was feeling, regardless of what rubbish my mind would through at me, regardless of anything. I would run. I put my ipod on and ran. This was my time, my space, my journey. As the weight started to fall off, I changed my diet and started to feel so much better about myself.

 

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